Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
