who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Randomize
