the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
