woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Randomize
