wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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