upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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