Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize