this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
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