East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
