she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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