big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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