Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
