the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
