Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
