So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
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