i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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