idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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