"it" just moved
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
