we have officially lost it.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize