Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize