yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
