Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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