Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Randomize