Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
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