OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
