ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
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