she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
