I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize