Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Fuck appropriateness.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
