im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize