We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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