Whod you bang
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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