i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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