Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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