My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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