she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize