whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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