Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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