You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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