dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
