WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
