well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize