Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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