I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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