you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
