Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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