she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
