She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
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