Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
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