Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize