smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
pop tarts are not kleenex
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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